7 Lies Men Tell To Get Into Your Pants

♀ Females take notes, they only get away with this when you let them..

♂ Mandem, if you know, you know..

I Love You.  

♀ MsLissaShanee – This is number one on the list.  This lie is considered to be one of the worst as it toys with the sexual partner’s emotions.  Any man that has used this method should be ashamed.  You should never have to deceive someone in such a manner.  If you are aware that the person in question will only give up their goods if promised that they are loved, and you are not in love with them, then that is not your kitty to take my love.  You just stole the pussy, doesn’t sound so great anymore does it, sounds like rape now doesn’t it?  Furthermore the concept is backwards, you don’t want to be a sweet boy,  (title used to describe men whom are sweet towards females, other men deem them to be pushovers), but you want to pretend to be one every time you meet a female you want to court?  Sounds like you’re an undercover to me, maybe you run once you’ve hit it to prevent yourself from being emotionally involved.  Maybe you’re in love fam *shrugs*.

♂ Ra X – Yeah men do tend to lie about saying I love you especially in the beginning stages. If that man hasn’t dipped in the pum and intimately caressed those walls he ain’t falling in love trust meh. Men have three things that make us spit those three words out faster than hot jollof rice. 1. Good Sex 2. Amazing head 3. 5* culinary skills in the kitchen. So if he is singing ‘I luh you’ before the first beat and you haven’t cooked for him be very weary. That man is what you call a lion on the prowl ready to devour his next prey.  However, wouldn’t you prefer men to use a positive term when slicing the cake instead of saying i hate you or you cool. Even if I don’t mean it, take it at the moment for what it is because I am in Love or Lust right now and that’s all that matters. The craziest thing is people in long term relationships are even lying to themselves and their partners saying I love you. Soooooooooooo 🙄 dry your eyes mate and don’t base sleeping with a man on whether he loves you or not before executing the three sure ways to make a man fall in love with you. I don’t understand how this lie still gets airplay because if he has to tell you he loves you and you’ve given him no means to love you, why are you opening your legs?

I’m Single.  

private eye

♀ MsLissaShanee – This lie should be becoming extinct due to the high level of accessibility to social media.  Females always have a private investigator friend among their squad.  ALWAYS.  USE HER!  As soon as you meet him you should do your research.  It is not always available via social networks so pay attention to what he says.  Female intuition is the real deal, if something is telling you this situation isn’t right then it probably isn’t right.  Also, do you have his undivided attention, it is understandable that some people are busy, but do you know why he is busy, is it feasible? Could he be preoccupied elsewhere? Does his phone die every day around the same time? Do you know what you are saved as in his contacts? *Whispers* ring him “accidentally”  while you are sitting next to him 😉 MUAD.

♂ Ra X – This lie is one of the dumbest because girls are actually attracted to unavailable guys, which I’ve learnt from experience so maybe a lie to be added is I’m in a relationship and that will surely get you more buns. However, this seems to be a top go to for males as most would like to avoid their partner being brought up or the possibilities of being found out and caught, because the girl you are trying to sleep with cannot investigate and stalk your girl if she doesn’t know you have one. That must be the main reason men say they are single because some of you side pieces or vacation pums do the most after getting some good sex. When we link your fine with the fact that i got a girl, but then when you get hit with that magic stick shit starts to go left, right, backwards and forwards. I will never forget a youtube vid I watched of a woman saying “Dick will make you slap somebody” and she ain’t lying. If you hit the right spots the side piece will transform into inspector gadget and ruin your so called perfect relationship. So I think it’s best, if you have a girl fellas, keep it to yourself. Don’t let these vacation pums ruin your happily ever after which really ain’t happy cause you stepping out but hey no judgement zone n dat.

I Won’t Do To You What All Your Previous Asshole Sexual Encounters Did.  

bag lady

♀ MsLissaShanee – Ladies, stop leading with stories about the similarities that all of your previous partners showed, once you had given them the kitty.  Obviously, when getting to know someone romantically, you will discuss previous relationships in the hopes that you can learn about the person and also both of you can get a better understanding of how you are in a relationship.  But you have to draw the line especially if all of your previous relationships went one way, to pot.  Also telling someone not do to something more time, will make them want to do it!  Think of it this way, you are telling someone that they need to work hard in order to solve an equation. Whilst you are telling them, you decide to tell them about the previous people who solved this equation.  You tell them that every single person that figured it out never worked hard, they cheated to gain their win, yet they were all successful and still attained what they desired. Why, after hearing this, would anyone want to work hard for something no one else does?  Think about it, “I’m not a mug, don’t treat me like a mug, every guy before this treated me like a mug, I allowed them to but please, whatever you do, don’t treat me like a mug.”   All he heard is you’re a mug and if he don’t beat, then he’s a mug.  Congratulations you played yourself.

♂ Ra X – First off I will shut this down by making it clear, most men are not bad guys. Like, I didn’t listen to you tell a million dramatic stories about your list of exes and how shitty they were to just go and do what they did. Don’t get me wrong if I have no intention of going beyond a fuck then everything you are saying is falling on deaf ears anyways, because i’m not even listening.  So am I lying if I say I won’t be like them man, when I technically didn’t even pay attention to the details of what the previous assholes in your life accomplished? NO! Also another point is we can come into a situation ready to not be like the last asshole but because you wanna be a bag lady n shit, all the bullshit from the past creeps up into your new situation and before I have a chance to act like tyrone you already giving me tyrone treatment. Some men will take it and see it as their duty to undo the damage. While other males like me will hear the judgement and accusations and say fuck it might as well embrace the tyrone in me cause she hasn’t even given me a chance. So sometimes it’s not really a lie, it’s you nagged and complained too damn much that I behaved like yo ex cause you just a crazy chick.

You’re Different.  

♀ MsLissaShanee – I mean you are one of a kind.  Unique.  But that is not what he is referring to.  He means your vagina is different, that’s why he wants to be granted permission to enter.  If granted you are no longer “Different”, you’re just one on his hit list of encounters.  Do not get wrapped up in a hoe’s mission.  He is a slag and will lie to continue to fulfil his prophecy.  He probably doesn’t believe that there’s variation in the female category.  Women are here to be sexed right?  Poke it, choke it, soak it and then conquer the next.  Value?  Women have Value? Fuck right off!

♂ Ra X – I mean everyone is different babes. If me saying that land’s me a ticket into your cosmic runway then sheeeeeeet, i’ll say that phrase in 7 different languages. Please understand men wife crazy women and hoes. So what makes you think him saying your different means anything? If you have the same eyelash like the girls on insta, contour your jaw and cheek to look like Kim K and use a million filters and photoshop to make your body look banging, guess what, man will still chat to you, deal with you and wife you. So does being different mean anything, NO! You just got gassed and that’s your issue. 9 out of 10 times if I have to tell you you’re different to get in your pants it’s because you are a generic bish. It’s cool own it, majority of us can’t even break past society’s mould of us anyway so continue being Jane Doe. Do you boo boo.

Let Me Put The Head In.  

let me put your head in

♀ MsLissaShanee – And then what? After he dips into your fountain of youth he’s just going to walk away?  The lie is even offensive, to think that he would believe that your temple would not tempt him to stay, worship you and give offerings is renk. That he could just evacuate at any given moment.  What happened to pussy power?  Ladies, you will learn today if you think he has that kind of self control.  Lies, you will learn 9 months from now when you’re not granting permission for a head to enter, but screaming as you let one exit.  

♂ Ra X – I think the pudding is in the lie itself. What grown man just wants to put the head into anything. Do you buy ben and jerry’s ice cream, eat a spoonful then give it to the homeless? NO! Do you go to the cinema buy a ticket, watch the adverts in the beginning then as the opening credits start you leave the venue? NO! Do you take a banging photo, add filters to it, edit the pic then almost post it on instagram? NO! So why would I put the tip of my head into the elixir of the Gods then back out like I’m good, you got that wet wet but I don’t wanna swim in it today, maybe tomorrow. If you still fall for that lie either you a gullible fool or you wanted to fuck just as bad as I do. But the problem is, if you are lying to yourself, doing image gang so I can’t say you’re loose, even though if you let me hit cause I put the tip in, that’s bad in itself. You should have more self control over what you want to do with your body, don’t blame me cause you let me put the head innnnnnn!

I’ll Just Eat You Out You Don’t Have To Return The Favour.  

♀ MsLissaShanee – Wait what?!  Now girls don’t get too upset because there are guys who really do mean this.  They gain pleasure from your pleasure and of course there are plenty females who also feel the same.  Then there are those that lie fully well knowing they expect the same back.  In fact, in the UK men feel emasculated by admitting they give head.  I don’t know for them guys there, how embarrassing, it must be, to not be able to be honest with your peers.  Tell me again why you don’t go down on females as I record this and send it to your last link, while we laugh like we just smoked the piffest chronic.  That’s another lie men love to churn out over here but let me not stray from the topic.  Due to the reluctance of UK males admitting they give head, once they have they may feel more vulnerable to females.  He can spit two two bars to get you into bed but once he has performed that act on you, he will look at you in anticipation for his turn as he can’t be the only one left vulnerable at this point in time.  Is he a dickhead?  To be allowing you to run round and tell everyone that he gave you head and you gave him nothing in return.  Nah he’s just mad insecure!

♂ Ra X – Don’t get me wrong there are guys out there that will do this. I am included in this list but usually I won’t tell you or scream about it. I will just deliver the service then reschedule the next dive in. If I am using this bar to get to sleep with you, then boiiiiii, nothing to say on the matter, just know we had an exchange you may not have been in agreeance with but hey potato, potatoe. It’s like going to a restaurant and ordering an appetizer which is basically the head. If you go to get Chinese and order spring rolls or chicken and sweetcorn soup, are you not getting some special fried rice or Singapore noodles after? So please understand, if the man is selfish and not looking to show you a good time regardless of the outcome, he is anticipating, through all your chatting shit, that once he goes down for approximately 10 mins, by the 11th min you’re not asking but begging to get dicked down.

We On A Break Right Now And I Don’t See Us Getting Back Together.

♀ MsLissaShanee – He doesn’t see them getting back together?  Is he Stevie Wonder? Piss right off.  From my experience men do not like breaks, they are not healthy to the male ego.  When a female asks for a break a man’s mind begins to tick aggressively.  “What do you need a break for? What to see other man?  You want to be single?”  This is due to the belief that women want relationships more than men, so why would this said female be trying to escape the one she is in.  So which man then openly claims break?  Don’t tell me what you don’t see, you should’ve gone to Specsavers.  Go home to your girl, leave me alone!

♂ Ra X – Erm question if he is on a break why is he with you instead of figuring out his shit or dealing with his girl to either patch shit up or come to a conclusion on ending things. If you find solace in men who are in relationship limbo you my child are setting yourself up for failure. If a man is on a break and he is telling you he is confused or not sure what he wants to do, RUN! That man is not confused he has a tongue like a snake and if you let him keep slithering at the mouth, pum won’t be the only thing you will be giving him.

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